And now for the Sucker Punch

So all that good news was just setting me up for what I should be used to by now:  The lousy sucker punch.

I started BCP or birth control pills (or OCP, oral contraceptive pills) four days ago.  The RE had told us I’d be on that for 2-5 weeks, then start a Lupron flare protocol to suppress the pituatary gland before and during the other stimulation drugs (all of which are injectables).  My SHG is next week, after I’d be on the BCP for just over a week. I figured I’d get off the BCP a week or two later, then move on to the stims (those fun injectables), then (God and Universe and Spirit Baby willing), on to egg retrieval (ER) and, fingers crossed, egg transfer (ET), all sort of before the big Christian holiday season.

Of course I thought that.  Seems reasonable enough, right?

Not so fast.

I just got a copy of my proposed treatment timetable and unless something changes after my blatant voicemail protest a moment ago, I will be spending that entire said big Christian holiday season stabbing myself with crazy-ass hormone drugs, having ultrasound wands rammed up my lady cave and blood let on a daily or nearly-daily (depending on the delicacy in question) basis.  My ER and ET will be in January 2014.

Really?  We are paying almost $10,000 for THIS?!?

I am sure this timetable is intended to ensure the RE and his RE-cohorts have a lovely Christmas.  But what about us?   Our first baby loss was on January 1, which is a day I have since come to dread.  Being jilled up on hormones that are not of my own making will be a fun way to ring in the new year.  That’s exactly how I planned to spend this holiday season.  Accommodating a rich doctor’s holiday calendar.  Great.

I clearly chose the wrong second career.

There have been a lot of cuss words coming out of my mouth in the last 17.2 minutes.  And no, the pleasant surprises did not prepare me for this.  You don’t butter a girl up and then sucker punch her.  That’s just wrong.

Maybe 6 weeks is no big deal in the big picture for folks.  But when the clock is ticking and the RE is telling you every millisecond over age 40 counts, 6 weeks IS a big deal.  Besides, we found out about 2-1/2 months ago that our third little baby this year was likely not quite right.  Two weeks later, her little heart had stopped beating.  The next week, I had surgery as my body was hanging on to our little baby with all its might.  Almost 7 weeks later, I started the BCP.  And now I have to wait almost another 6 weeks?  Really?

It all just seems so wrong.

The cuss words are bubbling up again so I’ll stop there.   Right now, I just want to give up.

Meanwhile, thanks for reading.  And wish us luck.  Please.


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